” Industrial Beauty ” by tgchan ( Sony A6500 + Sony Zeiss 24mm f/1.8 )

” It is one of those pieces… One of those pieces that nobody understands… Hesitation… should I delete it and move on looking for something more popularly likeable? No Chan, you shouldn’t. Trust your instinct. You were browsing photographs and something clicked right away when you saw it for the first time. That’s pure, something real, genuine beauty in its raw form. Keep it. So I did. It’s really hard to explain what I love about it without giving my own eyes and mind to someone else to experience it my way. Though I shall do my best and try to explain it. Let’s start with the major things first. Light and shade, both living in mutual respect, both perfectly completing each other. There is a beautiful bright and happy sky on the upper part, there is also not so happy darker shaded area at the bottom. They give this balanced and complete look of it. You also cannot not notice those four beautiful chrome chimneys… All shiny and glittering in the sun. An amazing reflection of them on the nearby wall, awesome green grass at the bottom left corner, billowy clouds above, branches… There is so much going on, so many things to look at… It’s cosy… It’s one of those special places. I call them ‘magical spots’. You just want to stand there and enjoy everything that surrounds you. It makes you so happy, full of appreciation and energy to live. It is also very hard to capture it. I keep looking at it, and I can’t believe I almost deleted it… I love it so much. Those colours and tint… Everything just ads up to itself creating this Industrial Beauty. Things like that gets me going another hours, days, weeks worth of pure walking… Just to find another one of those magical spots… “

Art Prints

 

 

” A War Of Generations ” by tgchan ( Sony A6500 + Sony Zeiss 24mm f/1.8 )

” You cannot stop time… No matter how rich and powerful you are, you just can’t. Generations after generations, they all fight for their own survival. This is how it goes, this is how it was from the very beginning. There are no permanent things. Some last longer while other shorter, but in the end… everything must perish eventually. The fight between generations doesn’t necessarily always have to end in the disappearance of the fallen one. Sometimes they can even coexist in a nice and civilised manner. Every generation has got its own prime time which is eventually replaced with another one, and another one, and so on. Some generations are so tough and resilient, they can withstand almost anything and still coexist with the next following ones. Games, films, cinema, television, internet, consoles, CDs, DVDs, smartphones and so much more, none of it could take books out. They have been around for so long that I don’t think they will ever go away… What is their secret? How come they have survived for so long? Even despite highly digitalised world, they still got masses of admirers. Could it be simplicity? Perhaps… or maybe it is something else. Probably a mixture of things like; nostalgia, simplicity, portability, convenience, deep engagement and many more. Books are simply magical… It is mind-blowing that a piece of paper and some letters stuck together have the power to take you to another reality. Even though I prefer different type of entertainment, I have a mad respect for them. Hopefully this generation will perish as the last one, just for the sake of an ultimate resilience.”

Art Prints

 

 

” Mechanical Sweat ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + SMC Pentax-FA 77mm F1.8 Limited )

” Just like us, it breathes… Get tired, old, fatigued, injured and somewhere along the way, finally die… just like us. Instead of dark red, its heart pumps dark brown blood, through its black and rubbery veins. It screams in agony when it’s hurt, and sleeps like a baby after a long and gruelling day. Our mutual connection with machines is getting closer and closer with each year passing by. It is a matter of time when planet Earth will soon welcome, a new generation of biomechanical hybrid human beings, carefully engineered and crafted. An awkward symbiosis between man and machine. Of course we can live without them, even though it would be very inconvenient. But the day when machines will no longer need our input to exist, is the day on which our extinction begins. I wish I were immortal… I would love to see the future so much. I don’t know exactly why, but I really enjoy looking at all mechanical things. They always look so focused and thoroughly constructed. There is definitely some magic behind it, or it is just me… and my weird affections for inanimate objects. Instead of lights; I see eyes and so on… arms, legs, joints, veins, eyebrows, eyelashes, mouths, even bums… So I am not overwhelmingly surprised when I saw it for the first time, the first thing I thought was; DAMN, look at all that mechanical sweat… “

Art Prints

” Boxing ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-50 + HD Pentax-DA 35mm F2.8 Limited Macro )

” After few years of body-building, I have eventually burnt out and lost all the motivation for it. I have learnt great amount of knowledge about myself and health being during that time. I needed something new, something I can dedicate myself into once again. Why not boxing? I asked myself. You saw Muhammed Ali’s clip and you loved it. Unfortunately you were busy with the body-building back then, but now, you are free to go. So I did start it. I have been training 3 days a week, then 4 days, and eventually I was boxing 6 days a week, sometimes even twice a day. I got whooped at my first sparring, but I have faced the fear and learnt a lot. I have kept training hard and I have figured it out, that the real satisfaction comes from fighting with myself and my limits. I loved every second of my trainings, I have even learnt to love getting whooped, but I always had trouble with hitting back and hurting someone else, I just didn’t want to do it. I am the kind of a guy, who worries a lot. I have started reading about concussions and other bad things… The dark side of thinking got the best of me, and I couldn’t stop worrying about my health. I hated the light headaches I was getting after fights, and I couldn’t stop thinking about them. Eventually some of my joints have started to ache as well. I didn’t give up, not until the one night… That day, I was all exhausted because of stomach flu, and when the night came up, I couldn’t fall asleep. I was lying for hours, trying to drift away into a sleep, but the stomach ache and the migraine just wouldn’t let me. That was the moment when I gave up, my mind snapped, finally… The decision was unbelievably hard on me, I didn’t know if it was me being lazy, or just a genuine instinct of backing off from a harm. Even weeks after, I was feeling terrible. It felt like I have lost something utterly important from my life. I was fast, tough, fearless and proud… I could finally face myself in a mirror, and everyone else… I have finally felt like someone that matters… It has been almost three months from the last training and that night, my life has returned to normal, but there is not a day when I am not thinking of going back… “

 

Sell Art Online

 

http://tgchan.com/featured/boxing-tgchan.html

 

scary reality…

 

It is scary… It is frightening, knowing that without my loving & supporting family I would have been in a deep fucking troubles…

My Father once told me that I am not adapted to “life” and he couldn’t be right more… I have been living in my dream world for too long… now I am having big problem handling all this shit which comes from the real one…

Approximately  a month ago I have lost job in a kindergarten. Since then, everything started falling apart in my world… At first I was happy, I had enough of that place and the idea of not working there again after holidays was soothing. It was my main job, I have had some private tuition in addition to it.

I have planned that I will take it easy, without main job I would have plenty time to relax, think about future and hopefully make some life defining steps. Before I had chance to cherish and enjoy my free time my brother came up with his own plans into my life.

He wanted/needed me to help him with his own business. I did a few things he asked me for him, but it wasn’t enough… He still needed someone he could trust and share his burden of owning a company. For almost a month I was thinking how can I handle all that responsibility and all that comes with handling such company… For fuck sake I was teaching little kids in a nursery before!

The most scary thing about it was the idea of losing my own free time which I value so much… It is not the sort of work that you depart in a factory/office and don’t think about when getting home…

As I have mentioned in previous posts, I am very emotionally sensitive and even mundane things can clog my mind for a long period of time… (just look at this for an example…)

I think I am really scared that something, some kind of a problem will stick to me like a shit and I won’t be able to get it out of my head… and right after I will handle this one the other one will come and so on, so on…

It is not only this… with that line of work you have to be very flexible with work hours, I just can’t see it working with my private tuition going on, unless I will spend all my day on the move from one place to another, without any real break… My mind would just fucking pop like a balloon…

So far English tuition for kids is my only source of income and it is not much…

I have agreed with my brother that I can work 5days a week from 8-14, so I have some time for my private lessons too, but it is still not good enough… You just simply can’t have fixed hours with that job unless you work 8-10h a day…

I love my brother, I don’t think there is a one thing that he wouldn’t do for me… and I really want to help him…

The thing is that we are so different, black and white. What is easy for him, for me is an incredible challenge… He doesn’t see things the way I am…

After a month of restless vacation I have decided to give it a go and see how things will unfold. I felt great. For a moment I have stopped worrying about the future and everything else.

It didn’t last long though… He realized (something that was obvious for me from the very beginning) that that he needs someone more flexible, someone who will not leave him alone with all this shit after few hours. I understand it perfectly…

So here I am again… Feeling like a fail brother… Without a clue what to do in life…

 

The truth is that I am the one who really need him, not the other way around! He can still do good or probably even better with somebody else in my place… The only real thing I could offer him was my trust… Something that nobody can deliver outside of the closest family…

I just can’t reconcile all this…

I should have known better already… I won’t find anything, nothing awaits me, I will keep wasting my time, trying to figure out life and worrying instead of doing some good… Something that could straighten all my problems…

There are hundreds of things that I could do better, why the fuck the only thing that I am getting  is something that I am totally not interested in and afraid of…

Oh wait! I think I might  just have an  answer!

 

 

life…