” Dunno One ” by tgchan ( Sony A6500 + Sony Zeiss 24mm f/1.8 )

There are so many artists… Even more people with all sorts of talents… It scares me… It scares me that there are so many amazing individuals the world does not know about? Why? Why do they have to live a life of an unknown? Why some people, very often less talented, climb the ladder of success while the rest, more deserved of that place, have to live a lesser life? It looks like having a talent and knowing about it is just not enough to be out there. You have to make yourself visible. You can’t be famous or even appreciated if the world doesn’t know about your existence. Death is the last scream your personality makes before it vanishes forever. I mean, even if you get all the ovations you can get, but you are still dead, what is it good for? You either make it on time, or it doesn’t matter… Unless you dream about some fame after your departure to another life. The one thing that scares me even more is not finding your real talent before it’s too late, or ever at all. I am genuinely scared of living my life the wrong way. ” Remember, the saddest thing in life is wasted talent. You could have all the talent in the world, but if you don’t do the right thing, then nothing happens. ” – A Bronx Tale (1993)


” Amber Gem ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + SMC Pentax-FA 77mm F1.8 Limited )

” I had found this amber gem a few minutes before it started to rain. Dark and ominous clouds covered the sky, and just when I was rounding the last block of flats, I found it. I wasn’t sure about it at first… But now, I am glad I had taken out my camera and captured it. There is something about it. The simplicity perhaps? Or the colours? Hmm… maybe the texture of the wall? I don’t know… And even though I am not sure what’s so special about it… I undoubtedly and honestly like it. It is my precious gem. Caught right in the last moment, before everything turned grey. The light itself looks like a little sun, captured in a glass shell. You can almost feel its warmth on your face when you look at it. Liquid magma contained in a carefully polished jewel. My precious treasure… you’re mine now. I keep starring at it, wishing my eyes could see more. Something magnificent has been captured here. I truly cannot get enough of it… but why?~! It is just an ordinary lamp on a building. I love it… I love it so much, and I don’t even know why… I guess it is yet another irony of life. Sometimes you just feel it… There are no words to describe it, nor logical explanation. You just know. You know it’s real and genuine… You can feel it deep down in yourself, living a separate life from your own… Unbiased and far away from any false influence. It just is… “

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” Stop Turn Or Reverse ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + SMC Pentax-FA 77mm F1.8 Limited )

” There are moments in life when you just have to stop… The big red light lights up and yells at you STOP YOU DUMB FUCK~! you’ve had enough. Sometimes we just can’t go forward any more, no matter how bad we want it… It is so hard to do anything when everything stands in your way. I often wonder if it’s the life letting me know I should stop, resign and focus on something else, or maybe… it doesn’t want me to reach my goal, because there is a big reward at the end of the troublesome lane I have chosen… Confusion… so much of it… So what should I do? Trust my own thoughts or go against them? Are they trying to help me or pull me down…? I can see the light but I am not sure what to do with it… I do not want to turn nor reverse, but I know… that if I will wait too long… someone will bump me, and force me to go forward against my will. Am I seeing my own red light here… or is it someone else’s reflecting in my eyes? So long in one spot, so much time wasted, the inevitable is close. My mind slowly corrodes, rust away leaving another hole… I look around in search of a direction, but the gloom around me is the only thing I can see, it gets to me. I can feel its cold claws climbing on my back and slowly getting around my neck, gently squeezing… letting me know and reminding… that my life is not my own, and it belongs to darkness. So here I am, the big red light right in my face, waiting for my move… the decision I have no idea about. It feels like the road I have known so well, ended at some point a while ago. I have wandered for some time now… it is pointless looking for the way back home, it’s gone. Do I even want to go back? Could I… ? Another STOP in my life… it’s different this time. I do not know the crossroads. Turn or Reverse… ? Why the fuck am I not seeing what’s ahead of me~!? I WANT THE THE THIRD OPTION. I am tired of reversing, I’ve got enough of turns~!!! I want a straight path to happiness, do you hear me~!? … What… ? There isn’t one for me… ? Oh well… I will leave the car here then… and check what’s inside of this dark forest that’s smiling at me…. “

Photography Prints


” Determination ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + SMC Pentax-FA 77mm F1.8 Limited )

Original Street Artist: Anna Matuszewska in association with Galeria Sztuki 58, Radom.

” Have you ever felt like life is trying to stamp you out? Have you ever felt a giant boot on your back trying to drown you in a puddle of mud? Don’t give up… Hold on… Endure. Life occasionally likes to throw you in at the deep end, and see how you do. No matter what, you cannot let it get you down. You have to keep your head above a threshold of resignation. Your body can suffer, it is only a vessel, but your mind… If it gets your mind, you are done my friend. Do not let it get inside of your head. Keep believing, throwing away all negative thoughts, stay focused, have your aim clear and in front of your eyes at all time. It takes a second of doubt and it’s over, you are doomed. It takes hours, days, months and even years to shake it off, start again. Even if you have to lie to yourself, do it. Once you reach your goal, the lie might become reality. People are not aware of how much we can control with our mind… Do things others think are impossible, shape our lives and bend the reality around us. If you think something is right, it probably is. Trust your instinct, it’s there for a bloody reason. Once you decide to go down your own path, the one that your instinct helped you choose, you are at war… At war with life and its own vision of your destiny. It will be dark and musty, it will be cold, it will hurt a lot and it will reek with decay, mould and with an easy way out of it… All you have to do to finish it, is just simply give up. Give up, on your own path you have chosen. Don’t. Do not give up. Life will be constantly trying to knock you down from the very last hope you are still hanging on. Keep strong. Look only there, where you can see yourself happy at the end of this rocky and slippery route you have picked as your own. Don’t give up… Hold on… Endure. Do not let go. Once life understands that you will never change your mind, it will has to back off and give you what you have been fighting for for so long. Keep hanging, keep fighting, stay focused and one day… you will feel this warm and pleasant light on your face. The light that will change everything from now on… “






” Hurt ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + SMC Pentax-FA 77mm F1.8 Limited )

Original Street Artist: Anna Matuszewska in association with Galeria Sztuki 58, Radom.

” Why do we hurt each other? What is even more important… Why do we hurt people we love? We hate the idea of hurting people we care about, yet we still do it… Is it the unknown? Is it because you can feel it more than anything else? Are we checking them or ourselves? That delicate and barely perceptible feeling of satisfaction that we caused someone pain. You can easily hide it, it’s a weak feeling, but it is there and you know it. Somewhere deep deep inside of you, you enjoyed it, you liked it, it feels good doesn’t it? We like to hurt, and we like being hurt. It shakes our flat emotionless life from time to time a bit, reminds us to appreciate the good things in our stagnated and impassive existence. Or maybe… Maybe I am wrong…? What if I got this all wrong!? Maybe people are not like that at all, maybe it is… Maybe it is just me…? Could it be, just me? What if I am a monster leeching on someone else’s feelings and emotions? What if I am a parasite feeding on souls of innocent creatures, causing them pain, and look… how they suffer in results of my foul doing. What if I cannot or don’t know how to love, and hurting is the only thing that makes me feel…? “


Art Prints





” Breakthrough ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-50 + HD Pentax-DA 35mm F2.8 Limited Macro )

” Sometimes, I have a feeling we are living on the different side of a glass. Busy with our lives, we cannot spot the glass which is in front of us. Our daily routines, successfully keep us occupied, blind, unaware. Some people are trying to see what is hiding behind all this, but even with a small hole, it is hard to see the big picture. What is the life trying to hide from us, why we are not able to see, what is really happening behind the curtain of lies. We know something isn’t right, but we cannot exactly point what it is. It feels like a dream, from which we cannot wake up. We can feel strings controlling us, yet we cannot see them. We try to get a grip with our lives, but someone else is trying to do the same and interrupt us. Should we try to smash the glass and see what is on the other side… or perhaps, we should go along with it, and see where it may lead us… One thing is sure, we are living inside of invisible walls, the prison we cannot see nor touch… “


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” Scrawny ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-50 + HD Pentax-DA 35mm F2.8 Limited Macro )

” Scrawny… my faithful fellow companion… We have been through thousands of kilometres, and you have never let me down… not even once. He may not look like much, but don’t be fooled by his appearance. Of course there are prettier and more powerful motorcycles out there, but not for me… none other can match the faithfulness and our long-lasting friendship. When I start it, the engine idle synchronise with my brain waves and from that moment, we think alike. I cannot stress enough, how much we love to travel across unknown lands. Chasing the sun, racing clouds and catching wind… When we ride together, the past and future cease to exist, all problems and doubts vanish like a falling star… there is only now and how we feel. It feels like falling asleep, slowly losing connection with the reality and after a while… you are in a dream, where everything is possible, and the beautiful day never ends… Scrawny, my faithful fellow companion… where should we go next? Will there be enough roads, to satisfy our never-ending appetite for new grounds? I don’t know… but I know this; even though you look great, standing in this sunlight, it is nowhere near, to how you look when you are on the move. Start up buddy, time to begin a new journey… “


Photography Prints




” Angry Grandpa ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-50 + HD Pentax-DA 35mm F2.8 Limited Macro )

” Angry Grandpa, yup, that’s him. We call this guy so, because he is old and mean to everyone around him. He sits in his garden all day long and looks around with those small but smart eyes, hidden deep under the emotionless eyebrows. A long stretched moustache across his face, successfully covers possible grimace. He doesn’t like kids, nor dogs, as a matter of fact… he doesn’t like anyone except for his other grumpy buddies. They visit him from time to time, they barely speak though, just sit there and stare at nothing together… Some say he remembers the war, others gossip about him being some kind of a hero. All I know for sure, is that he is not nice and he never allows us to play around his place… He has so many interesting things in his backyard… I wish we could go in there and look around some. Unfortunately, it is out of the question… Some say, he likes to plant landmines next to his flowers… I am not eager to find out if it’s true… “


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” Disconnected ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-50 + HD Pentax-DA 35mm F2.8 Limited Macro )

” It feels like everyone is going in the same line, doing things because people expect them to do it, acting in a way they are supposed to… why? The longer I think about it, the more scary reality I unravel. People are selfish, they expect you to behave in a nice and given manner, totally ignoring your own reality and predispositions, not to mention problems. Once they find out, that you refuse to dance to their music, they start treating you like their enemy, like you would have done something bad to them. Why? You only wanted to be respected, why do they have to bring their chaos into your life, why don’t they think about you; how you may feel about certain things. No, I am not like you or the majority of people. If you are going to talk to me, do it in a way, where I actually mean something, have an option and my choice is respected. I am sick tired of seeing everyone around, acting like a mindless bag of meat… Yeah, go on… Call me antisocial, rude, weird or whatever… it doesn’t matter, your rules do not apply to me. I am disconnected. “


Photography Prints





The music I have been listening to, while writing and developing the photograph:

” Fading Away ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-50 + HD Pentax-DA 35mm F2.8 Limited Macro )

” With time, everything fades away… Even this metal sign plate, will vanish and turn into a dust one day. There is no stop to it. With each year, letters will shift into unknown rusty patterns, more and more… devoured by the inevitable. The meaning will be lost, the purpose of the existence invalid. Time to go away, give back what was once given. Nothing will survive, it never supposed to. What has been created, will have to be uncreated. What had purpose, must become purposeless. The great big reset button, that keeps us under the control… “




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