” Spiky Greens ” by tgchan ( Sony A6500 + Sony Zeiss 24mm f/1.8 )

I always knew… I have always known what I want in life… I was sure and confident about it as well… I don’t know what happened, I mean I know… but it is too hard for me to believe it. It scares me because I know it’s true, and I don’t know the way out of it now… I have set myself on the path that was not designed for me at all… I have triggered the bomb, and I don’t know how to stop the countdown. Piece by piece, life is stripping me of what I have known… Leaving me with nothing but darkness and chaos in my mind. I don’t know what I want any more, what is even worse; I feel like the things I have always loved doing are leaving me as well… All my pillars of existence are crumbling underneath the weight of emptiness. I just don’t know any more… I feel like those spiky greens shivering and trembling in the wind, unconsciously waiting to be finally knock down from their highest point in life…

Art Prints

” Mystery Continues ” by tgchan ( Sony A6500 + Sony Zeiss 24mm f/1.8 )

” So, the mystery continues… I am still trying to figure out what’s so special about those blocks of flats to me. I think it comes from my childhood. See, I didn’t use to go out a lot when I was a kid. I was basically living my whole life in my beloved flat most of the time, and I really liked it. I was enjoying outside activities at my grandparents at the weekends, but that was it. Five days a week, I was sitting at my home playing games, watching telly and playing with my toys, all the time (except for when I had to go out to school, obviously; which I wasn’t really fond of…). I totally loved my childhood, by the way. Hah~!! I was just reading it over out loud and I realised that my current adult life resembles the one from my childhood almost identically… wow… It looks I haven’t moved in life at all… Anyway, I was spending my life in tight enclosed spaces most of the time, so this might be one of the reasons. The second one I have figured out is probably connected with my lone style of life. See, I don’t have many friends you know. To tell the truth, I don’t have any at the moment. I had two best friends a long time ago, but they are… out there in the world somewhere now. So I think, I really enjoy being around people, even though I don’t like 98% of them. I am leading a solitary boring life, so it makes me feel nice being in places where life just lives the normal way, you know? I am pretty sure it all adds up to itself. Childhood nostalgia, loneliness, love of being outside, taking something back as a souvenir and probably so much more… All that is the reason why I enjoy doing what I do so much, and it explains a lot why I am being so attracted to those places… I feel like I am at home, even though the real one is far far away sometimes. I feel I belong between those tall buildings (inside and on top of them too!). It’s a truly magical experience for me every time I go out there. I just wish I had someone to share those moments with… Just that one person I could take with me and get lost in time… “

Art Prints

” Industrial Beauty ” by tgchan ( Sony A6500 + Sony Zeiss 24mm f/1.8 )

” It is one of those pieces… One of those pieces that nobody understands… Hesitation… should I delete it and move on looking for something more popularly likeable? No Chan, you shouldn’t. Trust your instinct. You were browsing photographs and something clicked right away when you saw it for the first time. That’s pure, something real, genuine beauty in its raw form. Keep it. So I did. It’s really hard to explain what I love about it without giving my own eyes and mind to someone else to experience it my way. Though I shall do my best and try to explain it. Let’s start with the major things first. Light and shade, both living in mutual respect, both perfectly completing each other. There is a beautiful bright and happy sky on the upper part, there is also not so happy darker shaded area at the bottom. They give this balanced and complete look of it. You also cannot not notice those four beautiful chrome chimneys… All shiny and glittering in the sun. An amazing reflection of them on the nearby wall, awesome green grass at the bottom left corner, billowy clouds above, branches… There is so much going on, so many things to look at… It’s cosy… It’s one of those special places. I call them ‘magical spots’. You just want to stand there and enjoy everything that surrounds you. It makes you so happy, full of appreciation and energy to live. It is also very hard to capture it. I keep looking at it, and I can’t believe I almost deleted it… I love it so much. Those colours and tint… Everything just ads up to itself creating this Industrial Beauty. Things like that gets me going another hours, days, weeks worth of pure walking… Just to find another one of those magical spots… “

Art Prints

 

 

” Pastel Madness ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + SMC Pentax-FA 31mm F1.8 AL Limited )

” Beyond seven mountains, beyond seven rivers… there is a faraway land called, Pastel Madness. The local people living there believe in a very strange legend. Some of them claim that every 8 years a very special event occurs on one of the nearby hills. They say that during that special time you can ask for one thing, and one thing only, that shall be granted to you. It only works for one person so you have to be the first with your wish. It starts like every other sunset but it certainly is not. You can notice it quite easily with its unique delicate pastel-coloured sky. Now the fun part begins… After a short while of standing on the correct hill; oh yes my dear… you have to be lucky enough to stand on the correct hill during that phenomenon as well, you should notice strange winds accosting your body from every possible direction. What is so unique about them, you may ask… Well, what if I told you the winds have the most delicious scents you can possibly imagine, and they change every few seconds too. After the winds, the most interesting part comes along. The air around you supposed to get thicker and thicker. Soon enough, every pastel colour you can see around yourself turns into cotton wool. Different colour, different flavour. All within your arm’s reach, you don’t even have to move to get it, you just grab it straight from the sky. Once you eat enough, the time should stop for 8 seconds; that is the moment when you should shout your wish out. It sound ridiculous, I know… Yet, there are people who believe it so blindly that they are going to sacrifice their lives just to get a chance to make their wish… I’ve heard some crazy stories about people living on the hills, families moving to nearby towns and villages from across the world just to be closer to this allegedly special place, and many many more… I look at the sky, and it indeed look like it’s got this very magical pastel vibe to it… Sure, there was lots of wind going on too, but I didn’t smell anything nice, hmm… Did I get down too quickly? Maybe I was on the wrong hill? Damn it~!! Why do I even bother!? It doesn’t matter. It is just a story for kids. But the sky… there’s something about it… “

Art Prints

 

 

 

 

 

” Dusty Hill ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + SMC Pentax-FA 31mm F1.8 AL Limited )

” I saw that hill before… Unfortunately at that time I was unable to climb it and check what is there that’s hiding from me. I kept looking at it from down below with great curiosity. I knew I would come back here and find out what’s on top of it one day; it was just a matter of time. Not so long after, a few months perhaps, there I was… standing again and looking at it… The pros and cons running through my mind… The decision is made. I am going up. I crossed the road and started climbing it. It’s much higher than I thought it was. I started running. I want it now. I want to see what’s on top of it and I don’t want to wait any longer. I am getting tired. It is much much higher than it looks like from back down. And that wind… the higher I climb the stronger it gets. I start running again. My body produces tremendous amount of heat. I can feel my legs getting all swollen up from all the blood being pumped to muscles. I am walking and sweating. I can feel wind piercing my body. Will I get ill afterwards? Will the wind get me? I run again. My jeans are so tight they will burst any minute now. I keep wondering; how is it possible that my legs got so fat so quick. It feels like they have been hiding their real potential from me. The moment I checked the jeans on my thighs was also the moment I noticed all the mud around me. The soil was wet. What the hell… It was so dry back down. There’s an endless field on my left and right. The only thing that separates me from all this muddy hell is a very narrow path of grass I have been running up the hill. Unfortunately I have also found out that I am not safe even here… With every step I was taking, a big cloud of dirty muddy dust was arising from the grass… I was trapped. I was somewhere in the middle of my way to the top… my boots and the lower part of jeans were dirty, grey and white from all that dust I have been kicking around for the last couple of minutes… The moment of great regret grasped me hard and squeezed painfully. Stupid… so stupid; I thought. Who in their right minds would run up some big ass hill just to find out the view… I was seriously thinking of making my way back down, but what was the point? I would have to go back the same way and giving up now didn’t make any sense. I started running up again, occasionally looking down, only to find out how it hurts my soul seeing all that dust flying on my boots and jeans… Finally I reached the top… There was nothing there… The hill was just flat… and behind it… there was just mud… endless fields of mud… I remembered that one tree I had seen from back down. I decided to meet it in person… Unfortunately, the only way to it, was through the mud… It felt like walking through a minefield. I was scared that my next step will be tragic and my boot will get swallowed or something… After short but utterly stressful and careful walk, I reached the tree… We talked for a while… it was nice. I remember running down as quickly as I could just to have the dusty path behind me. I wasn’t happy back then, but now… when I look at my friend from the hill… You tell me, if it was worth it or not… “

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” Decoloured ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + SMC Pentax-F 50mm F2.8 Macro )

” What you see, what you feel… sometimes can go two different ways. Everything turns green, blooms, birds happily chirping, frogs croaking, colours have invaded dark and boring places… spring is here. It is warm, very warm, almost summer-like too warm, but the wind is making it all nice. Everything is so cheerful, happy and so damn alive… I am not unhappy or sad… unsettled and a little lost perhaps… I wish I could synchronise better with all beautiful life around me, derive more pleasure and satisfaction from where I am and what I have. Some things are sprouting and growing full of life, others shrivelling up and dying left alone… Spring, the time when yang is aggressively taking back what yin took not such a long time ago… I can see so many beautiful colours, I am so grey inside… I can feel so much life around me, yet I can barely live and feel my own. I can feel I become desaturated even more. The process of decolourisation is eating me alive, corroding my being and mind. Shake it off, shake it off, regain control. Bring the colours back to your life. There is love. “

Art Prints

” Oranged ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + SMC Pentax-FA* 85mm F1.4 [IF] )

” I am always curious of the setting of the sun. Sometimes, it gives you a wild spectrum of weird colours across the sky. Sometimes, it can even make everything around you look like it’s out of this planet. I was lucky enough to witness it a couple of times myself. It is a truly magnificent experience. Everything you look at, is drowned in colours that should not be there. They are unique, magical and makes your jaw drop with awe. Suddenly, you feel like you are somewhere else… like it’s not your planet any more, or the world is ending. Unfortunately, it lasts only minutes, and the sun is gone a short while after… taking this breathtaking visual effect with its departure. The photograph you are looking at, is the beginning of one of those moments. At that time, I didn’t know about it. I thought it’s just a nice sunset, that’s all. So when I shot what I wanted, and I saw the sun getting behind the horizon taking most of the available light with it, I decided to go back home. At about the halfway of my way back, I noticed that colours around me are getting pretty weird. All pink, magenta and purple shades were dancing right in front of my eyes, making everything around me look bizarre. At that point, I realised that I am going to miss out this marvellous occurrence… even worse~!! I was going to miss it with the camera in my hands. I thought to myself; it’s not gonna happen~!! So I started to run, and run hard to the only place that could give me at least a slightest chance to capture this rare beauty of nature. As I was running along, I had those beautiful photographs I wanted to have so bad, right in front of my eyes… Did I get at least one of them? Well, we will see about it… the next weekend… “

Art Prints

” 1A ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + Samyang 8mm F3.5 Fisheye CS II )

” Another journey, another gem well hidden deep down in the concrete jungle. Another great discovery. It is not only the place though. Time of the day, time of the year, weather, your eyes and what you currently feel behind them. All this and probably so much more. It is the proper combination of many factors, all well synced up. I could come to the very same place another day and it would look totally different, I might not even notice it in the first place. Hell, it might be even a matter of a few minutes, if not seconds. The sun goes behind clouds and the magic of that particular place is gone for that moment. What I am trying to say is… sometimes you are just meant to be somewhere at some point in your life. You are meant to experience and see events that have occurred just for you, and for you alone. This is what drives me. This is the reason why I grab the camera, this is the reason why I sometimes walk for ten hours in a single day. This is my reward and motivation. You never know what you will see, you cannot expect it, you can’t even imagine it. It is just there sitting and waiting for you, and once you finally face it, it fades away slowly afterwards, leaving nothing but an echo in your memory. ” For years I have been seeing the beauty of the everyday life, places and objects, not sure what to do with it… An invisible link between worlds which has always been pulling me in… How can you explain it to someone? The strange energy of awe that is coming from certain places, moments and things… How can you share them when they are so fragile that every second might be their last… ” – now I know… and you know as well. “

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” Good Afternoon Mr Tree ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + Samyang 8mm F3.5 Fisheye CS II )

” Good afternoon to you too, Mr Tree. How are you doing on this fine day? Good to hear, sir… good to hear. Oh, me? I am just fine, thank you. It is such a wonderful weather today, isn’t it? Yes, I completely agree. It really looks like a perfect day, doesn’t it? All those snowy white, puffy clouds in the blue sky, and this refreshing breeze… It is absolutely marvellous. Dear sir, would you mind if I took a photograph of you and these charming surroundings? No… No, not at all. You will fit just perfectly, worry not, sir. A little to the right, please. Hold it! Hold it… Got it~!! Now, that is going to be extraordinary once I return home and develop it, I can feel it. What the f… who the hell was I talking to!? A tree!? I am losing it… I am losing it again, what am I doing… She really crashed us, didn’t she… Way too fast chan… way too fast. We have totally lost the ground under our feet, haven’t we? You should have known better… fast changes are never good, they never are. One thing I will never understand though… How in the hell did she manage to break something already so broken, even more… how? It’s beyond me. Does it mean… I wasn’t broken before? Hmm, doesn’t matter. This tree… it bends like my reality… trying to reach the impossible. Are the things we always wanted really impossible, or are we making them that way? What is really stopping us from what we want in life? Is it reality… or what we create ourselves? The mush of loneliness, doubt, lack of entertainment, sense of direction and happiness, all this… at the same time. Such a bad timing Mr Chan, poor planning, too much emotions… too much of everything. I need my way of life back, my philosophy and beliefs, I need it all back. I don’t want to go back to the same place though, no. I need something different, I need to give myself a chance for something new, I need to know for sure. I can almost hear the voice telling me… Do not try and bend the tree. That’s impossible. Instead… only try to realise the truth. What truth? There is no tree. Then you’ll see, that it is not the tree that bends, it is only yourself. “

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” Inception Of The Tree Of Life ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + Samyang 8mm F3.5 Fisheye CS II )

” The Tree of Life… What are you doing here all alone, surrounded by all those concrete walls with glassy eyes? You are far away from your place, you must be so lonely… Look what they have done to you… How can you live like that? Constantly drowned in shadows, waiting whole days just for a glimpse of sunshine… it must be unbearable. Hmm… now that sounds awfully familiar… I think I know what keeps you alive, and I am most certainly sure how you must feel. Worry not my dear fellow, you are not alone in this miserable journey. You are beautiful, you know… You might not be in your ideal place in life, but you are truly special, and those who are lucky enough to be in your presence, really do enjoy your magnificence. Lost, but still unique and so uncanny. Have you ever wondered, why are we placed the way we are in our existence? Is it a pure randomness, or is it something entirely greater than that? If it is the first thing… we are truly fucked, aren’t we my friend? Imagine uprooting now, after so many years of wasted life… it can’t be easy, can it? If it is the second option… well, we have some purpose of being in such a position, and we can’t do much about it, except for understanding it, and waiting for the highest point in our lives. I don’t know… this thinking feels too comforting, could it be just a nasty lie? Where do you even seek such an answer? Can you know for sure, once you learn of it? Dear Tree… what is it going to be? Do we really have a chance? Can we really turn things upside down? Look, the sky is already bending to your will… I think we can… “

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