” Groups Of Understanding ” by tgchan ( Sony A6500 + Sony Zeiss 24mm f/1.8 )

A group of people here. A group of people there. You can rarely see somebody alone. And even if you do, there is a great chance they are just going to meet somebody. People are definitely not meant to live alone. So what gives that some people can’t imagine life without bunch of random friends around them whilst others can’t imagine being amongst almost anyone? I believe it is a matter of personality and its complexity. People without the greater depth are more likely to find someone similar to them than people whose nature is rather complex. If you are not on the same page as others, there is a good chance you will not be liked or enjoy the company of those people, probably both. Being alone is not a fate though. It is a choice you make. Of course some people have it much harder to find somebody similar to themselves, if they live in a small town or village for example. It is a matter of time and determination though, so if you really want to find some friend with whom you could share your weirdness, don’t lose hope; it is by all means possible. So going further down this road I’ve tried to answer my own question: why am I alone? I’ve come to a conclusion there is no single reason behind it, rather a combination of a few. The biggest one would be; it’s my choice. My complexity is beyond a chance to find anyone on the same page. The best case scenario for me is to find someone in the same book. My requirements and expectations are similar to my dreams, they’re almost unreal to reach. I don’t even clearly remember how it feels to be around a bunch of good friends any more. I used to have that in the time of my childhood and it was great, but… There’s just too much going on in my head right now, I wouldn’t be able to focus. So yea… it is my choice. It is nice to know there are people who would take their time and try to understand me though, I know they’re out there. Thank you for being and sorry for my isolation.

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THE PAGE WILL EXPIRE SOON – if you would like to stay connected https://www.facebook.com/thetgchan is a way to go

 

 

” Spiky Greens ” by tgchan ( Sony A6500 + Sony Zeiss 24mm f/1.8 )

I always knew… I have always known what I want in life… I was sure and confident about it as well… I don’t know what happened, I mean I know… but it is too hard for me to believe it. It scares me because I know it’s true, and I don’t know the way out of it now… I have set myself on the path that was not designed for me at all… I have triggered the bomb, and I don’t know how to stop the countdown. Piece by piece, life is stripping me of what I have known… Leaving me with nothing but darkness and chaos in my mind. I don’t know what I want any more, what is even worse; I feel like the things I have always loved doing are leaving me as well… All my pillars of existence are crumbling underneath the weight of emptiness. I just don’t know any more… I feel like those spiky greens shivering and trembling in the wind, unconsciously waiting to be finally knock down from their highest point in life…

Art Prints

” I Do Not Know ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + SMC Pentax-F 50mm F2.8 Macro )

” I don’t know… If you are reading this, there is a good chance that you are probably looking at one of my last photographs as well. It came out of nowhere… really. How could I not see this coming… I had a hard time bringing back something worthy from my last journeys. I should have seen that coming. I think a new phone which was a gift from my brother was the final nail in the coffin. The first video I made with it to be precise, was the point when everything has changed. The funny thing is that I have picked up photography in the first place because the idea of filming, storing all those videos and uploading them with my super slow internet… well… let’s just say, it didn’t look too attractive, and I have decided it wasn’t an option for me. Oh, and I couldn’t have sell and present my videos in such a nice way as the photographs. Not that I have sold any or it was my priority, but yea… at that time the dream was big and lucrative. Any way, there were many situation where I wanted to share something with a viewer, but the photographs were too limiting. I was going wider and wider with the choice of my lenses, but it helped me only to a degree. With a moving picture, not constrained to any particular frame, I can show what I love about certain places and things. Nothing really changed though, I still don’t like the idea of storing video files, uploading them with the same slow ass internet, and everything else to be honest… BUT! My last journey was totally dominated by videos… I have taken like 3 or so photographs, and made tens of short video clips which excited me so much. When I felt that great excitement while I was filming, that feeling that I can share everything what I see with a viewer, that was it. I knew this is the place I want to be. There are still many great things to photograph, and ideally I should have two systems with me; one for photographs and the other one for videos. Maybe I will be able to come up with something that will satisfy me in both. I don’t know… I really am up to my ears in filming. I don’t know where it all goes… I just know I love it, and this is my new way of expressing what I love. If you are curious about the new thing, just search for tgchan on youtube and you shall find it/ “

www.youtube.com/user/tgchan

Art Prints

 

” Autumnal Curtain ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + SMC Pentax-FA* 85mm F1.4 [IF] )

” Happy yellow leaves, dancing in the very last, warm autumnal breeze. Embracing with great passion and love, each remaining ray of sunshine. Soon, everything will turn grey, decay and fade away… But not just yet my dear friend~!! It is now, be happy~!! Dance, smile, hug your mates, laugh and cherish the moment, because after all… this is exactly what life should be about. Work, school, problems in general, are only obstacles on your path of being happy. Some people achieve this state quite easily, others must learn it the hard way. It may take years or even decades to finally realise that happiness is truly in your hands. You have the power to recreate it, whenever you want it. All tears and sadness, are there just to remind you that, it doesn’t have to be like that… and also that you shouldn’t settle for an average life. Those leaves know it, they know their power. Jumping in a wind like a bunch of happy springs, rejoicing in this blissful moment. You can find the light in the darkest places of life. You just need to open your eyes wide enough, and truly wish for it. Autumnal Curtain will soon fall down, and then… winter will come. But until that time though, it doesn’t matter… there is only joy. Learn how to separate your mind from the future and the past, and you will become really close to the art of recreating happiness… “

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” Green Starry Fellow ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + Samyang 8mm F3.5 Fisheye CS II )

” Damn… I feel so lazy today… I should be writing something smart here, but I am so not in the mood… and my god damn lower back hurts too… Anyway, this is the plant and it looks cool. Thanks-Bye-Please come again. Hah, nah… I am just joking… but I really do feel extremely lazy right now, and I don’t feel like I have got some nice writing in me today. Maybe it is the photograph… maybe it is just boring, and this is why I can’t write anything interesting about it? Hmm… but I like it. There is something about this scene. All those shapes, light and patterns, they speak to me in some weird language I do not understand, but I still like what I am hearing nonetheless… It feels like someone has spent more than enough time for this place. Caring about details, preparing it, like she would know that one day I would come and capture her work. I said ‘she’ because I think we can mutually agree, no dude would do such a thing, right? But then again… I might be mistaken. Oh well, it doesn’t really matter who did it anyway. The important thing is, it has been created, and I had a chance to capture it, that is all that matters. I wonder what is your favourite thing in this scene. I totally love the upper part of the lace curtain. It looks like some wicked sea waves during a dark and stormy night. The starry plant itself, doesn’t look too bad either. Hmm… the longer I look at it, the more things I like about it. I am glad it made it through. Damn… all this writing reminded me about very important thing. Never ever force yourself to anything, unless you really have no choice about it. It is just a waste of energy. I don’t say nothing good can come out of it, but the whole process is such a chore, that it may give a totally opposite result in the long run. Just go with the flow, and when it doesn’t go smoothly, leave it there, change direction, and do not look behind. Real talent doesn’t require a heck of a lot of energy to do things, you just do them, and you are not really getting tired from doing them. That’s the beauty of a talent. So, if this is what you are after, it is quite easy to notice if you are on the right path. Take care. “

Photography Prints

” Super Cosy Spot ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + Samyang 8mm F3.5 Fisheye CS II )

” Not in direct sunlight but in shadows… not in complete darkness though, my sweet spot lies. Somewhere between those two… Somewhere close, so I can see the transition clearly and derive the best of both worlds. Once the light weakens, the shadow grows stronger, slowly devouring and conquering the lands that originally belonged to it. The war will be over soon enough, but the victory is not permanent, nothing ever is… What you take, must be eventually returned. The light still fights strong, bravely pushing darkness back to its black roots. Futile resistance, yet so noble and admirable. I stand there and observe two of the greatest powers duelling for domination, right in front of my eyes… Me, a mere mortal… and even though I know whose turn to win is this time, it’s still magnificent to be a witness of it. Besides, you can never be certain of anything. I can already feel the chills of darkness on my back, but my eyes are focused on warmth of the light in front of me. Beautiful… isn’t it? Now, the best thing is that I can start moving with the darkness, chasing the light and feel the power of the winner. If I choose to… I can step into the light, and start feeling the dread of annihilation, running away in fear. Everything changes… things once so obvious become mysterious. Familiar shapes start becoming unknown and ominous. Uncertainty… is it really the place where happiness dwells? Or is it the moment when you can choose between two things, but you have still not decided, draining positive energy from the both possible realities at the same time? You know you will have to decide what to choose eventually, losing one thing or another as a result of a decision, but you keep stalling the moment, enjoying the freedom of choice. Is it a freedom? Why do I have to choose? Can I choose not to choose? Where am I going with all this…? It doesn’t matter what hides underneath… Just enjoy it. The very same way, I have enjoyed being at my super cosy spot for that brief moment. “

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” Good Afternoon Mr Tree ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + Samyang 8mm F3.5 Fisheye CS II )

” Good afternoon to you too, Mr Tree. How are you doing on this fine day? Good to hear, sir… good to hear. Oh, me? I am just fine, thank you. It is such a wonderful weather today, isn’t it? Yes, I completely agree. It really looks like a perfect day, doesn’t it? All those snowy white, puffy clouds in the blue sky, and this refreshing breeze… It is absolutely marvellous. Dear sir, would you mind if I took a photograph of you and these charming surroundings? No… No, not at all. You will fit just perfectly, worry not, sir. A little to the right, please. Hold it! Hold it… Got it~!! Now, that is going to be extraordinary once I return home and develop it, I can feel it. What the f… who the hell was I talking to!? A tree!? I am losing it… I am losing it again, what am I doing… She really crashed us, didn’t she… Way too fast chan… way too fast. We have totally lost the ground under our feet, haven’t we? You should have known better… fast changes are never good, they never are. One thing I will never understand though… How in the hell did she manage to break something already so broken, even more… how? It’s beyond me. Does it mean… I wasn’t broken before? Hmm, doesn’t matter. This tree… it bends like my reality… trying to reach the impossible. Are the things we always wanted really impossible, or are we making them that way? What is really stopping us from what we want in life? Is it reality… or what we create ourselves? The mush of loneliness, doubt, lack of entertainment, sense of direction and happiness, all this… at the same time. Such a bad timing Mr Chan, poor planning, too much emotions… too much of everything. I need my way of life back, my philosophy and beliefs, I need it all back. I don’t want to go back to the same place though, no. I need something different, I need to give myself a chance for something new, I need to know for sure. I can almost hear the voice telling me… Do not try and bend the tree. That’s impossible. Instead… only try to realise the truth. What truth? There is no tree. Then you’ll see, that it is not the tree that bends, it is only yourself. “

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” Inception Of The Tree Of Life ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + Samyang 8mm F3.5 Fisheye CS II )

” The Tree of Life… What are you doing here all alone, surrounded by all those concrete walls with glassy eyes? You are far away from your place, you must be so lonely… Look what they have done to you… How can you live like that? Constantly drowned in shadows, waiting whole days just for a glimpse of sunshine… it must be unbearable. Hmm… now that sounds awfully familiar… I think I know what keeps you alive, and I am most certainly sure how you must feel. Worry not my dear fellow, you are not alone in this miserable journey. You are beautiful, you know… You might not be in your ideal place in life, but you are truly special, and those who are lucky enough to be in your presence, really do enjoy your magnificence. Lost, but still unique and so uncanny. Have you ever wondered, why are we placed the way we are in our existence? Is it a pure randomness, or is it something entirely greater than that? If it is the first thing… we are truly fucked, aren’t we my friend? Imagine uprooting now, after so many years of wasted life… it can’t be easy, can it? If it is the second option… well, we have some purpose of being in such a position, and we can’t do much about it, except for understanding it, and waiting for the highest point in our lives. I don’t know… this thinking feels too comforting, could it be just a nasty lie? Where do you even seek such an answer? Can you know for sure, once you learn of it? Dear Tree… what is it going to be? Do we really have a chance? Can we really turn things upside down? Look, the sky is already bending to your will… I think we can… “

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” Different Level ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-50 + HD Pentax-DA 35mm F2.8 Limited Macro )

” Still beautiful, still colourful and perfectly usable, yet… already cast away. It used to be so high, dancing on wind above everything else, singing with birds and looking at the best sunrises and sunsets his entire life. What happened? What might have he done to deserve such punishment? No more saying hi to white billowy clouds, no more waving to rising Sun and birds flying by, no more looking at the horizon and what it might bring, it is over… Lying in dirt, surrounded with this green and boring bunch… Why oh why do I deserve such a punch!? Ants, worms, puddles and occasional dog pooh! This is ridiculous~! I protest on the hoof~! I do not agree with all that crap. There is no way my mind can withstand all that… Help me before I lose myself… to the point of not coming back. But… to whom am I going to cry it all about? Who will listen to all my quandaries and problems… There is nobody… Time to see the life from a different level… Wait a second… What is this light? How magnificently bright! Look at those colours and shadows, aren’t they marvellous!? Listen, can you hear the music? What is this sorcery? Where is it coming from? How beautiful… Maybe it is not so bad as I thought it was… The smell… so nice and refreshing… God damn… Am I in heaven? I think I am, and to think that I thought I will vanish in this place… I guess, everything depends on how you look at things… or maybe… How long can you last, before you see the light… “

 

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http://tgchan.com/featured/different-level-tgchan.html

 

 

” Solar Panels ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-50 + HD Pentax-DA 35mm F2.8 Limited Macro )

” Yet another human invention that is based on something that nature had done million… if not billion years ago. We are getting quite good at copying the master, but still… we have a long long way ahead of us, before we reach this level of advancement. I mean, just look at it… non-toxic, compact, recyclable, efficient, adaptable great looking and multi-purpose machine, that not only utilises waste, but also produces the life giving products… how can we ever match that superb kind of technology. It feels like the nature has scattered all her greatest blueprints around us, in hope that one day, we will be able to notice them and make use of it. The more I think about it, the more I am afraid of our ignorance. Did the nature let us play in her backyard with our primitive toys, just to learn and look up to her creations? Are we up to the task? Will we ever get smart enough to significantly replicate her steps? How much time have we got, before she will throw us out for wasting her time and resources? Heh… little green leaves that nobody sees, flapping in the wind… Still far superior and more advanced than anything we have ever created… “

 

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http://tgchan.com/featured/solar-panels-tgchan.html