” Groups Of Understanding ” by tgchan ( Sony A6500 + Sony Zeiss 24mm f/1.8 )

A group of people here. A group of people there. You can rarely see somebody alone. And even if you do, there is a great chance they are just going to meet somebody. People are definitely not meant to live alone. So what gives that some people can’t imagine life without bunch of random friends around them whilst others can’t imagine being amongst almost anyone? I believe it is a matter of personality and its complexity. People without the greater depth are more likely to find someone similar to them than people whose nature is rather complex. If you are not on the same page as others, there is a good chance you will not be liked or enjoy the company of those people, probably both. Being alone is not a fate though. It is a choice you make. Of course some people have it much harder to find somebody similar to themselves, if they live in a small town or village for example. It is a matter of time and determination though, so if you really want to find some friend with whom you could share your weirdness, don’t lose hope; it is by all means possible. So going further down this road I’ve tried to answer my own question: why am I alone? I’ve come to a conclusion there is no single reason behind it, rather a combination of a few. The biggest one would be; it’s my choice. My complexity is beyond a chance to find anyone on the same page. The best case scenario for me is to find someone in the same book. My requirements and expectations are similar to my dreams, they’re almost unreal to reach. I don’t even clearly remember how it feels to be around a bunch of good friends any more. I used to have that in the time of my childhood and it was great, but… There’s just too much going on in my head right now, I wouldn’t be able to focus. So yea… it is my choice. It is nice to know there are people who would take their time and try to understand me though, I know they’re out there. Thank you for being and sorry for my isolation.

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” I Miss You ” by tgchan ( Pentax K-5 II s + SMC Pentax-F 50mm F2.8 Macro )

” I don’t know where you are… I don’t even know how you look like… but I miss you… I miss being with you so much… I know you are out there… somewhere… and I am scared… I am so damn scared that we may never have a chance to meet each other. It’s unsettling… Have we already met? Is life playing with us? I can feel, you might be my key to everything. I miss you… I yearn for you… but I don’t even know if I could really live with you… Maybe this is why we have not met each other… maybe I am just not ready yet. Doesn’t matter. I just wanted you to know that I am thinking about you, and I really miss you. One thing I am certain though… If I am not able to give you what is required for your long term happiness… I would rather never see you. I do not want to be your disappointment. I would rather chase a ghost my entire life, rather than being with you, and knowing that I cannot change your life for the better. My inner self is torn apart… I don’t even know what I want any more. I mean, I know… but I also know that the things I want come at price. Actually no… they may come at certain price with the wrong kind of girl, but theoretically speaking, not with you. This is why I want YOU~!! and no one else. I am tired… it’s late. I have to go sleep. I really can’t wait for our first journey… a long drive, hours of walking and exploring, looking at the beautiful world shining in the sun, a delicate breeze… It can’t be just dreams… it feels too real, too vivid and too close… Good night my love, wherever you are… “

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